"HULK" Is Far From Incredible *1/2

It's nice when there's truth in advertising. Universal wisely dropped "The Incredible" from its new release, "Hulk," since the end result of this downbeat, dreary picture is anything but.

Eric Bana brings new meaning to the word deadpan in his portrayal of Bruce Banner, a scientist who inherited a nasty bad side from his poor excuse of a father (the scene-chewing Nick Nolte, looking eerily like his recent mug shot brought to life). Add the lifeless Jennifer Connelly as his marginal love interest, and the end result is like watching a Vulcan love story minus the pointed ears.

Since the military and the girl's father NEVER understand angst, Sam Elliott makes a game effort in the stock role as Hulk's nemesis, the military man who throws every kind of firepower available at the green guy, despite the fact that his recuperative powers makes all of it wasteful and redundant.

Much has already been said about the CGI effects in "Hulk," and I'll add my two cents. In the action scenes, the scenery is every bit as manufactured as the hero. The end effect is that in the middle of a scene, one suddenly feels like he's eavesdropping on a Game Boy excursion. All suspension of disbelief is shattered, and the movie becomes pure video game.

"The Incredible Hulk" was actually a pretty good 70s television show, with Bill Bixby portraying Banner as a Richard Kimble-type loner, going from town to town looking for work and a change of clothes at least twice an hour. It wasn't enough for producer Kenneth Johnson to have the effects and the colored contact lenses. The television series had heart and purpose. "Hulk" has neither.

What "Hulk" DOES do right, however, is maintain a stylized comic-book look with its inventive use of split screen photography to remind us that this is a fantasy world. Only TV's "24" employs split screen to greater effect.

Danny Elfman's soundtrack is also inspired, evoking the television series' action theme frequently, adding to its nostalgic feel.

"Hulk" has already taken in 62 million dollars at the box office and has been deemed a disappointment (X-Men 2 boasted 85 million). I don't see a long future for "Hulk," but I wouldn't mind seeing the Sci Fi Channel bring back the Bixby version. Even if just to hear that soulful Joe Harnell piano solo one more time.

By Bill Wilson