I remember as a kid going to visit my grandfather's farm. In one portion of the pasture was a section where kudzu covered the ground. It started out as a small patch, but over the years it covered more and more of the land making it really unfit to do much else with. At some point, my grandfather decided to try and cut it back and I remember the vines being unbelievably long. The vines went in many different directions that were nowhere near the original starting point of the little corner where I first saw them. And, as the vines grew they literally sucked the life out of all vegetation in its path. Once the vines were cut back all that lied underneath was barren soil.<br />
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I experienced something recently that brought that experience back to me. I met a young child who was in a waiting area based on her mother being in court. Her mom was in the courtroom testifying about a crime that had been committed towards her. One of my cohorts asked the child if she was excited about Christmas. The little girl explained that there would not be any Christmas this year. Her mother had told her that there was no money available this year and that Santa Claus had cancelled Christmas.<br />
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After looking into the case of the mom, I found out that she had been the victim of a domestic violence case and that she was now the sole provider of the little girl and her older brother. Based on the financial hardship that this situation had caused, the mother had concocted a story for her child that would prepare her in some way for the fact that she would not be receiving any Christmas gifts. It was so sad to see that this child would be punished based on this vicious cycle of crime; that was through no fault of her own.<br />
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I was saddened by this situation, but I must say that I was not surprised. I have seen countless situations where children are victimized simply by being in the homes where criminal activity is occurring by one of their parents or guardians. In some cases, the parent or guardian is the sole provider, from a monetary perspective, for the entire household. Once the actual victim of the crimes being committed finally musters up the courage and strength to have the violator removed from the house, the victimization is two-fold. The actual victim can be left with injuries, both mental and physical, as well as peripheral damage to children in the house as well. Also, the removal of the only income available brings on a whole new set of problems to the household. While the courts may require the offender to keep contributing to the household, more often than not the money dries up very quickly.<br />
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After a period of time, perhaps the offender will be incarcerated as a result of not obeying an order of the court which guarantees that no other money will be coming in. It is a literal catch 22 for the actual victim and their family. This situation is what leads some victims to withstand years of physical, sexual and mental abuse before they finally bring in the authorities. They know that they have no way of supporting their families without the income of the abuser. And, the abuser is quick to remind the victims of this fact and will lean on that upper hand while continuing to dole out what is sometimes unmerciful abuse. It is truly a cycle that is vicious and sometimes deadly.<br />
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Some strides have been made recently regarding shelters and organizations that cater to victims such as this in an attempt to remove them from these violent situations. No one, and especially children, should ever be forced to remain in these homes based on their fear of how they would survive without the abuser's paycheck. Nonprofit organizations that cater to the basic needs of these families, from a sustenance perspective, as well as the other mental and physical care they need are beginning to be of great help to these victims. Others even go as far as providing vocational and job training which will put the victims and their families in a situation of self-sustainment. We still have a long way to go to take care of the many victims but the work that is being done is promising.<br />
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On the court side, punishments and sentences that are reflective of this type of crime continue to get the needed attention that is necessary to curb this type of behavior from domestic violence offenders. The punishment should always fit the crime. And this type of crime that goes well beyond the victim who may suffer the initial blow must be no different. One single act can be felt by so many people as a result of their actions. Women and children, and yes, some men as well are being victimized in numbers that are alarming. Just like the kudzu, the choking of life forms in its path, which are far from the original growth, can be devastating. Once the kudzu is eliminated, it can take years for new growth to take place. The soil has to be cultivated, replenished and nourished before new growth will begin.<br />
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In the meantime, it is both safe and sad to say that Santa's sleigh will not touch every roof top this year. Unfortunately, the roofs of some houses are strong enough to support the extra weight. Let's hope and pray that an epidemic of new roof construction will be available next year.<br />
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If you would like to have Stan speak at your next group event, please send your requests to
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The views and opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author and are not those of the Gwinnett District Attorney's Office.
