Reduce Holiday Stress in Your Family

Holidays are an exciting time for many people. Families get together, celebrations abound, and good food and good friends are nearby. But the festivities can also lead to family stress. During the holiday preparation season, many parents are strained and children are cranky or overexcited. Some of this stress comes from changes in schedule. Young children especially have a hard time adjusting to schedule changes. A special event like a holiday party may interrupt regular eating and sleeping schedules.

Parents often are stressed because they feel overloaded. Most parents want to make holidays special. But some adults go overboard buying gifts, planning parties, baking, cooking and decorating in a quest to make this "the best holiday ever." It's ironic that the stress of holiday planning keeps some families from relaxing and enjoying the holidays together.

If tension is mounting at your house, here are some helpful tips to ease holiday-planning stress:

Forget the "perfect holiday" myth. Your family will still enjoy the holidays even if you don't do everything you'd hoped to do. Choose a few favorite activities or preparations (decorating sugar cookies, for example) and don't worry about the things you don't get done.

Reconnect with your children. Give your children at least 10 minutes of uninterrupted attention. Sit down with them and just talk. When children know you're really interested in with them and not thinking of other things, they'll feel less stressed.

Give children a role. Find ways to include them in the holiday preparations. Perhaps they can help with gift-wrapping, decorating, baking, or addressing cards. If they feel involved, they won't need to act up or whine for your attention. And helping out teaches them new skills that make them feel competent.

Ask your children for special gift ideas. Even little ones can come up with thoughtful gift suggestions for family members, teachers, or babysitters.

Get them into the kitchen. Include your children in holiday cooking and baking. Helping prepare party foods or gift baskets can introduce children to the joys of giving to others. And cooking is a fun way to reinforce math and reading skills!

Be selective about parties. Try to limit your holiday social obligations to a maximum of two evenings a week. Put reasonable limits on the number of holiday events your children attend, and try to find events at times that don't interrupt naps and other routines.

Savor family traditions. Observe a few family rituals every holiday season. Take time to enjoy these traditions, even if it means missing the neighbors' caroling party or a dinner with out-of-town friends. In time, your children will look forward to these family traditions as a special part of the holiday season.

Reference: Virginia Molgaard, Iowa State University Extension.

Debbie Wilburn is County Agent/Family and Consumer Science Agent with the Hall (770)535-8290 and the Forsyth (770)887-2418 County Extension Service.