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Me, on the other hand, that’s a different story. Soccer makes me retreat, retreat, retreat. The kid attacks on the field whereas he normally retreats on the sidelines. I’m the opposite. I am normally a loud, vivacious and opinionated kind of person. But not so much in situations like these.

I haven’t written in awhile because it’s hard to know what to say and some days I don’t even have the energy to try. I have a feeling many of you are feeling much the same.

I'm working on scientific proof of what I call Pavmom's Theory of Conditioning. Maybe you can remember learning something about this scientific theory in school… In the real theory, Pavlov's theory, a bell ringing would cause dogs to salivate in preparation for food. In my theory, kids do the same thing, but with mommy noises.

Eating out is my love language. I’ve always said this. I think it must be because I crave and value uninterrupted time with my family. Eating at home is chaotic and I hate to cook. Then I have to clean. Truly, if you love me, you will take me out to eat.

Life isn’t about entering battles I am destined to lose. Even if I “win” momentarily, I can lose on the exact same subject by the very next thread posted by people who haven’t been true friends in a long time, if ever. I want to make a conscious decision to step down, out of the virtual bubble that defeats me, and into the real life that beckons joy and peace.

I hope my kids remember me as loving and kind. I don’t want them to remember how I responded when they decided to empty all their dresser drawers after I spent two days folding all the laundry and putting it away. So, sometimes I have to utilize the resources I have available to me to deflect a few of those trying moments.

How do I talk to my children to explain about the evils of which they have not encountered? How do I? How do I teach my children better? How do I peel off the layers of generational hurt and anger? How do I help them understand the issues that I myself do not understand?

What a weird season. Every time I think I step firmly down, the step shifts and I have to find my footing again. So, here we are. Wherever that is. And wherever I am, I want to grow and learn from this time that I have.

When I began this blog, I committed to providing an authentic insight to my crazy life, wrought with messy, sticky honesty, but I had no idea how much material God would provide. So, I guess I’m here to remind you that you are probably having an o.k. day, unless you also dug through multiple trash cans of a public restaurant with your bare hands.

Gratitude. What does that word mean to you?