Every now and then, when a certain fad becomes popular, I find my wondering if I’m as cool and hip as I like to pretend to be. It’s happening again as I see more and more people who feel the overwhelming need to back their vehicles into a parking space.
I’m not ashamed to admit it. I don’t get it.
I spend a lot of time in my car. It’s my studied opinion that most of the people I encounter on the roads today barely know how to operate their cars when they are moving forward. The thought of these people putting their cars into reverse and backing into a space only a few inches wider than the car itself terrifies me.
And with good reason. Have you spent much time in a parking lot lately? It seems no one has a clue how a parking lot works. For the benefit of those of you reading this today who are unclear, let me help. Your car is supposed to go between the painted lines on the parking lot. When your car straddles one of those line, you are doing it wrong and you are taking up an extra space that someone else might need.
I’m convinced that the adults who can’t park a car between two painted lines are the same folks who couldn’t color between the lines in kindergarten. And I don’t have scientific knowledge to back this up, but from my observations, I think many of these people are the same ones backing into a parking space.
I’m also convinced that car backer-uppers think their way is the only way. Recently, I went to the grocery store. I parked – completely properly, mind you – in a space. When I came back to the car, a woman had backed her car into the space in front of my car. And she got mad at me because she was having a hard time getting to the back of her car to load her groceries.
I have a friend who backs his pick-up truck into a space all the time, so I asked him why he does it.
“It saves time,” he said.
Saves time? Are you kidding? Yeah, the eight seconds you save by pulling directly out of a parking space instead of backing out, then pulling forward is really going to free up your day. You’ll be able to read a book, plant a garden, cure cancer. But darn it all, you burned up your eight seconds backing into the space, which take more time that simply pulling in.
Are we really in such a hurry all the time that we need this so-called time savings? I mean, really the only time a person needs to make a quick getaway is if he’s just pulled a bank heist. So if you’re a John Dillinger wannabe, go ahead and back your getaway car into a spot. Otherwise, if you’re that hurried, skip the store completely. Order online and let the friendly UPS man bring you what you need.
I thought maybe this was just a young person thing, that maybe I was getting older and not really understanding the youth of today. Then just this week, on two separate occasions, I saw people far older than me doing it.
Thank you for reading this today as I tackle one of our biggest challenges. Soon, I’ll move on to another – slow drivers who won’t move out of the fast lane on the interstate.
