Thursday March 28th, 2024 11:25AM

Time to lay down the law on slaw

By Bill Maine Executive Vice President & General Manager

I believe I have finally hit upon an idea that will have me rolling in cabbage, literally. It was sparked innocently enough during a conversation with a co-worker. I mentioned how much I liked the slaw at Kentucky Fried Chicken. It has a rather sweet taste, and I can eat mass quantities of it without tiring of the taste or texture. So, it was suggested that I open a slaw-only restaurant.

At first glance you might think this a tad absurd. But it’s not as odd as you might imagine. Think of other restaurants that were seemingly single-focused ventures. Dunkin’ Donuts, Burger King, Dairy Queen, and the aforementioned Kentucky Fried Chicken all come to mind. Yes, Kentucky Fried Chicken. Call it KFC all you want, but we all know what the “F” stands for and around these parts “fried” isn’t a four-letter word. Of course, if it were it would be “frie” which doesn’t really make sense and it drives spell check nuts.

A slaw-only restaurant certainly lends itself to a bit more variety within the stated genre than Kentucky Fried Chicken. Beyond original recipe and extra crispy, how many other types of fried chicken are there? Sure, there are nuggets and fingers, but really they are just fried chicken cut into smaller bits.

Slaw, on the other hand, now there’s a world of variety. You may be thinking, there are only two types: coleslaw and slaw. If so, you’re wrong.  So what’s the difference? The term “slaw” refers to any chopped raw vegetable dressed with vinegar. Coleslaw is a type of slaw that uses cabbage as its main vegetable ingredient. If that tips your canoe, don’t blame me. The term “coleslaw” comes from Dutch term “koolsla”. “Kool” means “cabbage” and “sla” means salad. Cabbage salad.

Slaw isn’t only categorized by the type of vegetables used, but also the type of dressing. It can be tangy, sweet, creamy, spicy (hot), peppery, and salty. I found 50 different slaw recipes on Food Network’s website alone. They include Buffalo, Waldorf, Blue Cheese, and Russian. Reading the list out loud felt like being in the movie “Forest Gump”. (Fried shrimp, boiled shrimp, shrimp cocktail…) If you’ve seen the movie, you know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t, I highly recommend it. Maybe watch it with a friend and share a cup of slaw.

The right name for this new venture is crucial. It has to capture the incredibleness of a restaurant dedicated to slaw. In my mind, a place like that can only be described as “Totally Slawsome”.

At Totally Slawsome, we will offer meal-deals for the budget-minded. Our five-dollar meal deal will feature two scoops of your favorite slaws, a side order of slaw and a beverage. Speaking of beverages, be sure to pick up one of our slaw shakes, especially the “Slaw Shake Redemption”. It’s your favorite slaw whipped with Greek yogurt into a delicious, refreshing, and healthy meal alternative. It’s sure to be a hit with the health conscious diner. And, don’t forget, we use yogurt made with live bacteria, so it’s loaded with probiotics. If it’s your regular, you will be too.

I realize many of the restaurants I mentioned earlier have had to branch out from their original mission. Dunkin’s Donuts now serves breakfast and lunch sandwiches that aren’t even made of donuts. Seems to me if “donuts” is in your name and you serve sandwiches, donuts should be used in place of the traditional slices of bread. Perhaps I'm being a bit picky.

At Totally Slawsome, we’re anticipating that and are already working on a meat lover’s slaw. Reflecting on my “Forrest Gump” reference, perhaps a shrimp slaw would be a good idea too. I think we’ll stay away from the surf and turf slaw.  That may be too “white tablecloth” for the relaxed, affordable atmosphere we’re going for at Totally Slawsome.

Why my interest in Totally Slawsome? It’s more than an interest. It’s a passion. A mission, if you will. As a father of two, I don’t want my family to grow up in a slawless society. I think the slawlessness of our current time has gone on too long. I put restaurants who continue to show a blatant disrespect for the slaw on notice. Have shredder…..will travel.

By the way, those with venture capital to throw my way can drop an email to [email protected].

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